I've given alot of thought to the attachment and bonding issues that our sweet Chelsee and her new family will be faced with. Sometimes, I want to read everything I can get my hands on and other times, I just want to let things fall where they may. I feel confident that we will know what is best for Chelsee when we meet her and find out a little bit more about her age and personality. If she is a baby, she will need different attention than if she is an older child. So there are lots of unknowns at this point, but one thing remains constant:
Our daughter has been abandoned, sent to an orphanage and/or possibly a foster home.
She will almost certainly come to us from a feeling of loss – loss of a birth family, culture and language. There are helpful things that we can do to address these issues, when standard parenting practices aren’t right for adopted children. I read this article recently and think it has merit: http://www.emkpress.com/pdffiles/grandma%20guide.pdf. It sounds harsh at first to me, but then I think about what is best for Chelsee, not her loving family members. What do you think?
1 comment:
I don't think it sounds harsh at all! The child is going to feel overwhelmed at first - who would want to be bombarded by well-meaning relatives when you don't even understand who they are? Also, the article mentions keeping your child physically close: i.e. using a sling and keeping your child on your lap at mealtime. All very good suggestions!
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