Hard to put into words....

Very hard....this feeling that has been creeping up on me the last few months is hard to describe. But I want to, for Chelsee's sake. We have been home with Chelsee now for 9 months! Some days, it feels like we have never been without her and some days, it feels so brand new again.

My feelings are beginning to get the better of me. I can tell I am finally relaxing about this enormous load I have been carrying since we learned a year ago that we have a precious new child to love and to care for! I've always been the kind of person to mark things in chronological order so I knew the year passing since we have known about our Lu Fu Mei would make me reflect heavily. But I did not think it would make me so pensive and reflective about what her life was like this time last year and now. I thought I would concentrate more on how I was feeling this time last year (sad but optimistic again) and this year (thankful and happy beyond words).

I've caught myself looking at Chelsee or looking at Julee and Chelsee together and thinking about what she was doing this time last year. What was she thinking? What was she doing, feeling? Lots of times over the past year, she has told me that she was waiting for me! She asked me one time, "What took you so long?" So while I think it's great that she feels we belong together, I hate it that she felt the pain of the wait too! I used to pacify myself by thinking that at least Chelsee didn't know it was taking so long to be together. But I was wrong! She did feel it. It might only have been for a few months while we (and China) prepared for our trip, but still....it hurt her!

I've caught myself crying (ok, sobbing) over the milestones Chelsee has reached so quickly. When I saw her up on that dance stage making her debut by singing and dancing to "All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth," I made a fool of myself. I kept flashing back to her referral pictures and the image I have of her the very first afternoon after we met. Such a looong long way you have come, my angel, and it fills me with such pride. Later, when I found out you were scared to go on stage and perform, I melted because you still did it, you sweet thing. And you danced so beautifully, I could see your pride! You will always be the bravest little girl I know!!

I've caught myself welling up when Chelsee sat on Santa's lap after checking him out thoroughly first. She wanted to know a lot about him before deciding it was ok to sit on his lap. She is observant and does not miss a thing....a very good reminder to me to always watch what I say and do. I love the questions she asks because it tells me she is making sure she understands as much as she can before allowing herself to believe it and learn it. Check out the video of Chelsee with her first Santa.



I've also caught myself becoming a little too complacent with Chelsee's attachment. She outwardly shows how seamless it has appeared but deep down, she is still figuring out how to accept her new family completely! I know of a few of the subtle signs she is exhibiting, but since she appears so happy and adjusted, I have to remind myself that she is still attaching. It is such a personal and interactive process and it never completely ends. I try to always remind her that she is safe, secure and loved. I keep having to tell myself and Al to be patient because Chelsee requires sensitive parents capable of constant emotional support! The more we accomplish now, the less she will struggle later. Thankfully, there are not many food or sleep issues, so that helps us as parents. Julee is a wonderful help, but she too talks about how she wishes she didn't have to think about what she is doing with her sister or how she is speaking to her.....but what a wonderful lesson in parenting she is getting!

All in all, I am feeling very positive that we are providing Chelsee a wonderful new life and more importantly, one that she loves fiercely! It has been a long time coming, but I am so thankful to be at this place, finally!!! Thank you to all of you that have helped me get here, you are priceless to me!

The "Sprite" of Christmas

It has been enormously satisfying to teach Chelsee about our American traditions surrounding this time of year. I imagine our traditions must seem bizarre to someone new here but to a little kid whom we assume never celebrated much of anything other than Chinese New Year - well you would just think it would be overwhelming....and it is to Chelsee. But she seems to want to learn more and more. We just take it slowly for her sake.

We were VERY successful during Halloween - see previous post! Then Thanksgiving...ahhh! Food and time with her family - yep, another wonderful tradition she has taken to. Who knew she liked sweet potatoes? Her teacher spent a few days talking about and teaching the kids about Thanksgiving, the pilgrims and the ways to show you are thankful for what you have. She has that skill down pat! Little does she know yet just how thankful we are for her!!

And now Christmas is upon us ~ our first together! I'm trying to go easy but the media, tv and friends make it a little hard to keep the spirit of Christmas intact. I've talked to Chelsee about our traditions and she likes to feel a part of them. I like it when I overhear Julee telling her how we do things. Like most things Chelsee encounters, she asks 100 questions...about God, Christmas songs, red and green, Santa Claus, Winter break from school, etc. My gut tells me it's good she asks so many questions cause she is still making her way in this new world. But lordy, it's hard to stay patient and answer each question with an appropriate answer! Chelsee likes to repeat what she learns to anyone who will listen and we get the biggest laughs when she applies her new language to these new topics. I heard her tell her dad all about the "Sprite" of Christmas! She is soo funny! I love it that she can laugh at herself too!

Merry Merry Christmas my sweet doll. We are SO happy to be celebrating our first Christmas together with you! You have made us all smile a little more and laugh a little more....what a difference from last Christmas when I was at the end of my rope waiting for you, my sweet angel. Thank you God and Happy Birthday!

8 month update

We have been home now for 8 months. We are still seeing wonderful progress with Chelsee's adjustment to her new life but for the most part, all is basically normal and happy for her....which I think is really the most amazing part! To see her go to school every day, learning by leaps and bounds, tease her sister, cry when hurt and search out comfort from her mom, make jokes that are honestly funny, correct us on our English (and Chinese), insist she is old enough for gum and especially to thank us for all we have given her.....it just seems unfathomable and miraculous to have only been with this child for 8 months! So I lay my head down each night with a special note of thanks to God for putting us together...I am witnessing a miracle!

So, we have kept busy to say the least. We go out of town quite a few weekends a month for Julee's soccer and Chelsee does very well. She enjoys the car rides for the most part and has endeared herself to all the soccer moms on the sidelines! She has pretty much just assigned herself the role of mascot and no one seems to object!! She is developing a sweet tooth which I so tried to avoid but she is still eating beautifully and LOTS!! She has even gained weight, yahoo! One day, I think she will make it on to the American charts!

We recently took a wonderful vacation to Disney World. It had been 5 years since our last visit and we all were anxiously awaiting this trip to introduce Chelsee to all things Disney! She LOVED it and so did we! I absolutely loved seeing my precious Julee take her little sister's hand and show her all the princesses, rides, attractions, etc! Finally, I thought, my dream of Julee having a little sister to love, teach and share life has come true! Al and I were sitting at the Shamu Theater in SeaWorld just out of the "soak zone" and I looked down about 10 rows to see Julee showing Chelsee the magnificent whales and taking off her top to reveal her bathing suit so she could get wet when Shamu came by! Julee is a wonderful, wonderful big sister! I am still pinching myself that all our hard work and patience and faith in our efforts to complete our family has paid off, in a huge way.



We visited EPCOT (had lunch in China of course), SeaWorld and the Magic Kingdom. Each is better than the next and we thoroughly enjoyed all that we did. We stayed at the gorgeous Marriott Grande Vista Vacation Club courtesy of Al! That was a treat all by itself. We will be going back - soon, I hope!! If you'd like to take a look at half of the pictures I took, click on the link below:

http://www2.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=2452830009/a=56965061_56965061/otsc=SHR/otsi=SALBlink/COBRAND_NAME=snapfish/



Another new and exciting event in Chelsee's life was her first Halloween! I kept imagining what she would think about dressing up in a costume, taking a pumpkin looking bag up to a stranger's door at night and saying "Trick or Treat" to get some candy! ALL of those concepts were new and strange to her! NOT A PROBLEM! Haha, she took to it like...drumroll...a kid takes to candy!! That was ALOT of fun for her...her eyes were wide in disbelief that she could score candy this way and be out in the dark and walking around! She keeps telling me she LOVES this life here with her family! She tells me she likes it much more than China! Good thing, I guess! Chelsee chose to be Kai-Lan for Halloween. Kai-Lan is Nick, Jr's newest animated play-along series featuring a Chinese girl and all her friends. Chelsee identified with Kai-Lan early on and we all have learned more Chinese from the behind the scenes curriculum on the show. But since the show is relatively new (2008) and not nearly as popular as say, Dora the Explorer or SpongeBob, the pre-made Kai-Lan Halloween costumes were pretty lame. Lame enough for even me not to purchase! Target and some other stores have started carrying some Kai-Lan items, but it was up to me to come up with a costume for Chelsee. We all know I do NOT sew nor do I want to! I love ordering online and using coupons for things like this!! But there I was at Michael's picking out fabric paint and searching 3 stores for just the right blue colored shirt to decorate. I printed out 2 different pictures of Kai-Lan's clothes and took about 2 weeks to complete just the shirt! Luckily we had some orange shorts for her to wear on the bottom! Kai-Lan wears her hair in 2 half pony tails with a red flower in each pony. You try finding red flower pony tail holders! There are blues, blacks, yellows, greens, chartreuse, magenta, pink, neon orange but NO red. I was now on a mission....and at a going out of business party shop on the way to Charleston, I stumbled upon a Spanish Fiesta party package that had some yellow and red flower looking pony tail holders....they would have to do! And they did, they looked great! Here is proof!


















And yes, while I was being all creative and crafty, I also created the felt Thing 1 and Thing 2 logos for Julee and Lydia's costumes. Tricia was responsible for the red outfits, blue hair and white face makeup...Don't they look great? Here is to next year's store bought costumes!

Settling into the new normal....

There! I said it! The new normal has arrived, I think! We still have to get past the "I am unintentionally unemployed but loving it" phase I am stuck in. I do love being home, always have, but the budget does not allow that luxury so I have been diligently sending out resumes and networking as hard as I can. No luck yet! I know something will come along but I sure wish we could find something NOW!! I have cut back in every area I possible can! I am going keep this frugalness going too!

Meanwhile, we really have gotten things working pretty well with school and activities in full swing. Julee and I have always liked being on a set schedule and Al can go with the flow most times. We didn't know how Chelsee would like our routine at first, but she seems to love it like we do. We do the high school thing early in the morning, a long walk for Philly, sweating in the garden, and then breakfast which sometimes includes my littlest sweetie and sometimes not! Chelsee loves her sleep like I do! And so if she doesn't feel the need to pee, she can sleep in til 8a or 9a! Or sometimes, she just plays in her bed (she LOVES her bed) for a good long time before calling for me. She never gets out of bed on her own! We love that about her. If she stays in her bed, then I get the rare read-the-paper-alone-without-20-questions time. Albee gets up sometime in here too and we all just start doing stuff around the house. Wash, cleaning, songs, flash cards, coloring, eating, shopping, whatever needs doing!

Then I get Chelsee ready for school, teeth brushed, peeps, etc! She can nearly dress herself now; she has made great strides there. Albee usually takes her to school and she is beyond ready to go at this point! I have exactly one and a half hours between when Chelsee goes to school and Julee is done with school! Right now, Julee is on the JV volleyball team, so she stays after school for practice most days. I pick up Chelsee from school, run an errand or 2, get Julee and bring them both home for a quick snack and we are back out the door for that night's activities. We have one or more scheduled activities each weeknight except Thursday....which I am sure will change as soon as I hit the enter button. Julee, Chelsee and I try to eat dinner together and if Albee is off that day, he joins us! Homework, reading books, baths and bed! I have to sign a tree's worth of papers every night and write something down on the calendar for the next day! We do lunches at night. I volunteer for as much as I can right now but I will have to pull back when I get a job!

It is a pleasure and an honor to be these 2 girl's mom! I take pride in making them happy and teaching them how to smile in this crazy world! Today, I asked Chelsee to come over and sit with me on the couch cause I wanted to tell her how much I love her and to tell her how proud I am of her. I told her she is doing a great job and that she is so brave. That we love her being in our family and we love it that she is so happy with us. She hugged my neck so hard she shook! A wave of emotion came over me and it made me cry! I think this is really feeling real to me now! She is my forever daughter and I adore this child. She is such an amazing person and I can not thank God enough for putting us together! She really seems to understand what has happened to her and that her new life is now her forever life. She talks about China all the time and how we came to meet her there and bring her home. She tells me she is soo happy that I am her mommy. She does NOT want to call me Mama because that is for another woman.....and Chelsee tells me she does not want that Mama to be her mommy. Sometimes Chelsee tells me things about her other Mama that no one wants to hear but I praise her soooo highly for telling me all about her. That way, her feelings are out and we can talk about them. Chelsee also talks about going back to China, but that I have to come with her. I know she is trusting me now and I am so relieved she feels so secure that she can tell me the things she is remembering about her life in China. We are so lucky she can do this.....it is so wonderful for her to talk about all of this.

I'd also like to send out some prayers to my niece Jennifer, her husband Bruce and their 2 children. They are battling a horrific disease as a unified family with dignity and grace. I am so proud of them and wish them love and prayers as they face the unimaginable. They inspire me to be more patient and kind and to be thankful for all that I do have! Today and always!

6 months home already

Wow, it seems impossible to believe that we have been home with Chelsee for 6 months already! And then again, it seems like she has always been with us! The pain of the never ending wait to meet our sweet daughter is still strong in my heart but with each day, and each sweet kiss, it does seem to melt a little. I find myself reminiscing about our trip to China and what a life changing time that was. Again, it seems like the 2 weeks we spent there flew by in a heartbeat but that each day there lasted a month. These time stretching feelings kind of take you by surprise when I least expect it!

What an amazing 6 months it has been. Never in my imagination could I have thought a new child would have adapted so beautifully and tightly to her new life! Chelsee continues to amaze every one she meets with her smile, her attitude, her language skills and her questions! Oh the non stop questions! How can I want her to be quiet after I waited FOUR years for this precious child? Oh man, that contradiction is as hard as the time-flying-by-and-standing-still one!!

She loves school! And by LOVE school, I mean she adores school! And by ADORE school, I mean she wants to be dressed in her uniform, teeth brushed and "packpack" ready two minutes after she wakes up in the morning! She has to wait til 1230p to leave so sometimes the morning get a little looooong for her! She has a little routine for saying good bye to her dolls, stuffed animals and Philly of course! Sometimes, she picks out her bows for her hair which MUST match her shirt....sometimes, she want to tie her shoes all by herself.....sometimes, she has to run back and put something else away just as she is walking out the door! Every day is a joy for this child which in turn, brings the sweetest sense of pride to me, her humble mom! I have loved being home to share her day with her, she still likes to tell me ALL about her school day! Unlike my precious oldest daughter who just says "fine!" now.

Well, we are knee deep in Readoption mode. Our papers are at the attorney's office and we are awaiting court filing approval. I am not sure if we will have to go to the county courthouse for an official appearance or if the paperwork is stamped and mailed to us! Either way, Chelsee will soon have an American Birth Certificate and US Citizenship. Again, this tugs at my heart. In one way, I am happy to have all the paperworks done and finished. She can get a social security card, a passport, etc in her American name. But this sort of takes away her Chinese name at least here in the US. I feel a very special pull for Lu Fu Mei since it will always be my sweet little girl's name in my heart! Chelsee feels normal and natural but more like a nickname than anything else! Onward tho.....

Proud and Sad at the Same Time...

Today was about as hard and wonderful as they come. I am so proud of both of my sweet girls as they enter new stages of their lives on the same day! Julee started high school today with nerves, excitement and a $75+ outfit!! So beautiful and so innocent. We have complete faith she will thrive in her new school and suspect she might even believe it too! This was one of those times where you imagine them as babies and then as a preschooler going off to school with their backpacks bigger than their little bodies and wonder "Really, where has the time gone?" And knowing that things will never be the same again after this day......

And then, a few hours later, our newest little one was dropped off at her new school to begin her Pre-K year. Chelsee was soo excited and so confident, it definitely made it easier on this old mom! Al and I talked to her about using her nice manners and listening to her teacher, Mrs. Moody and how she was going to make some new friends. She told us she already knew this and that to make sure we told everyone she was a big girl today! Her Kai-Lan "packpack" is almost heavier than she is and just about the same size but she can put it on and take it off like she has been doing it for years. I am so proud of this little one...to think she was in China without a family to dote on her just 5 months ago! And now, she can speak a new language and is ready to go off to school and learn so many things and be a part of a classroom and know that mommy will always come and pick her up. It is just beyond my wildest expectations! Truly remarkable to witness!

I have to admit, I kept my composure this morning when Julee walked out that door with her dad (30 minutes early)...then sat down and put my head in my hands! But with Chelsee, oh lordy, my voice kept creeping up into my throat all day. And when they came to take her out of her car seat in the drop off line, I still stayed cool with a big smile and a very happy send off! But as I looked back to see her looking up at and holding her new teacher's hand, I just lost it. She is so brave and so confident, it just took my breath away! I just can not wait to have both of my girls back in my arms again....I HATE the first day of school!!!!!!!!!

But how lucky I am. I know I am blessed to be the mom of these two magnificent girls. Tissues, please!

A long overdue update...

I know, I know, I am long overdue for an update post on how our littlest cutie pie is doing. Well just take a look:






We think she is doing amazingly well. She is happy, healthy and growing! She is also stubborn, obstinate and hysterically funny at times. Chelsee loves to meet new people but always remembers who Mommy, Daddy and Julee are to her. Just don't wake her up! Otherwise, there will be $&*(# to pay. Her dad says she gets that from me!?!


Let's see. We have been having many wonderful days at the beach this summer. A secret dream of mine was that Chelsee would love the beach as much as I do. And she does. She has her toys, her lem-a-lade (lemonade) and her tiny bikini and she is all set for a full day at the beach. Sometimes, she even falls asleep in my arms in the afternoon for a quick nap. We meet up with other families and they all take turns playing with her. She loves to swim in the pool as well. She can blow bubbles underwater and kick her feet while I hold her on her tummy. She even closes for mouth for a few seconds...cause otherwise, if she is awake, her mouth is moving!!!


Julee, Chelsee and I took a trip to Minneapolis in July. We explained to Chelsee that this was going to be another airplane trip but that we would be coming back home to our house and Daddy and Philly in a few days. She loved flying and had LOTS of questions about it. We had a few problems with flights but both of my daughters were troopers. Julee is an amazing help to me each and every day! I was so happy to finally introduce Chelsee to Bit - Al's mom. She and Chelsee have been talking on the phone alot but it was so rewarding to me to finally have them meet in person. Also, I was very anxious for Laura to meet Chelsee. She has been with me every second of the way since we started this adoption process and I couldn't wait to show her my new daughter. I say daily prayers that their adoption doesn't take as long as ours did but she was able to see that no matter how long it takes, it is worth every second. All in all, a whirlwind wonderful vacation to our old home town!


Meanwhile, Chelsee has been accepted in to the Early Childhood Center's Preschool program!! She is so ready. I've had to shop in the toddler section for some "uniform" items for Chelsee. Khaki bottoms and pink, white or light blue polo shirts on top! And now that Julee is entering public high school, we are having to shop for new clothes for her now too! No more uniforms for Julee....till next year that is when her school adopts a uniform policy! Still better than blue plaid skirts tho, right, Julee? I say that having your two children enter Pre-K and High School on the same day is too much for one mom to handle! I might need a valium for that day!!!


And we have taken another very important step to continue the process of finalizing Chelsee's citizenship. We have met with our social worker in SC to prepare the 6 month post placement report. June came to our house to meet Chelsee and check on her progress. June was nearly speechless! She pronounced her "fluent" in English and was very pleased we have enrolled her in school. She made sure we are on track to begin the re-adoption process which we are. Once this 6 month post placement report is completed and sent to China via our adoption agency, we can start the paperwork for citizenship, formal name change and American birth certificate. It's alot to do but well worth it for her future. We have found an attorney specializing in this procedure and I am not dreading any of this paperwork - yahoo!!!


Here is a pic of our family that will be sent to China to show them how we are doing. I sent 5 other shots of Chelsee and Julee too. I have no doubt China will be thrilled with their placement of Lu Fu Mei with the perfect family for her here in the United States!!







Oh and just as a sweet side note...as we were posing for this picture, our wonderful, sweet Philly came up and sat down right at my feet so she could be part of the picture! How could we not have invited her over ourselves???? Cause she truly is a member of our family. Philly and Chelsee love each other very much. Chelsee is very very fond of animals and knows all of her extended family's pet's names. Sometimes they are the ones she names in her prayers instead of her human family members!!!

Happy 1st/4th Birthday Chelsee!!

I can't seem to wrap my head around today being Chelsee's 4th birthday! I can't believe we have her now and that we have the privilege of showing her how to celebrate a little girl's special day for the FIRST time! And then, I can't imagine not celebrating the last 3 birthdays of hers either! Either way, it's just so strange (yet wonderful) to be with Chelsee on her 4th birthday and to lavish her with gifts and attention and love! Although, that is exactly what all our days have been like since March 2, 2009!

We will keep it sorta simple with cake, ice-a cream and candles. All Chelsee really is interested in is blowing out the candles and singing the Happy Birthday song! I know she will like all the presents, etc but I know deep down, just loving her like we all do is all she really wants! I am betting next year though she will have list a mile long!! Hahah!

And as always, Chelsee's birth mom and foster mom are always near my heart. Today, I thank them from the bottom of my heart for the gift they have given me. I can not explain the depth of gratitude I have for these women for making my dreams come true! I love this child so deeply and I wish they could know how happy they have made so many people so far away!


Here are some pics....

Two Months Home...

Doesn't even seem possible that we have been home with Chelsee for two months now but we have! How come the months and years we waited for her didn't go by this quickly???




Sisters made in heaven...


Chelsee continues to make huge strides every day and amazes all of those around her by simply living life like she has always been here!! I keep pinching myself to make sure that this is all real. The fact that she can look at me directly in my eyes with love or tell me that she is tired, hungry, ready to poop, loves her sister, gives spontaneous kisses, and TALKS non stop all seems much too good to be true! But true it is! She is so happy learning all about her new life and family and friends. She dances to Julee's iPod music and mimics her sister's choreography with amazing precision! Now, she doesn't even need Julee to show her the steps! She now knows almost all the letters and numbers and loves to tell stories all on her own in well spoken English.

She is showing such confidence that the word "No!" and "Why?" are flying out hourly. You can see and feel her muscle tone growing strong now which is thrilling. Julee is determined to turn this child into a tomboy when in fact, I am beginning to see some girly girl characteristics emerge! What a joy to watch both of them fall deeply in love with each other. Chelsee loves to sing, whether it is "Twinkle Twinkle" or FloRida's "Right Round." She loves to go to her Chinese classes each week and is starting to listen to the Chinese words now. We hope she can keep some of her native language but right now, we hear 99% English coming out of her mouth! Chelsee sleeps through the night in her own bed after saying prayers and snuggling with us. She eats almost everything we offer her - all the best fruits and veggies plus Albee's treats!!


Just loafing around....


She has made such progress that I am now rethinking my initial estimate that we would keep her home from any formal schooling this coming school year. At this rate, she really will need to be in some organized learning class in the fall just to keep her stimulated with all there is to learn. I have already run out of body parts to teach her!! I am interviewing some local preschools and Chelsee will be evaluated next week to see where she stands. Wow! I never thought we would be this far along so soon! We were given such a magnificent child to love and raise! We are so blessed!



Chelsee's Baptism 4/19/2009


Another wonderful bit of news is that we have been in contact with Love Without Boundaries, a foundation consisting of a worldwide group of volunteers dedicated to improving the lives of orphaned and impoverished children in China. LWB sponsors Chelsee's orphanage in Lu'An City, Anhui. Their love and dedication is apparent in Chelsee and I now believe she has adjusted so well because of the care and love she has been shown since birth. LWB has sent me one of the most coveted gifts an adoptive parent can receive: Baby Pictures! I now have hundreds of pictures of our Lu Fu Mei dating back to March 2006 along with progress reports from her foster family and the orphanage. This is invaluable for her future questions and so tremendously satisfying for her forever family!!! You know I am busy framing and hanging pictures all over the house in the few remaining bare spots left!!

More when I have 3 minutes to myself.......(yea, right!)

A Very Special Day

Today was a beautiful day for our new family. We celebrated Chelsee's baptism and felt more deeply the honor it is to be her forever family. She continues to be a delight and is thoroughly enjoying living life and learning so many new things each day! But today seemed even more sweet as we welcomed her into God's arms with Julee as her Godmother and Bob Byer as her Godfather.

Chelsee met some very special people this weekend - all of whom came to share this wonderfully sweet day with us. Bob is Albee's good friend from Minnesota; he flew down for the weekend to become Chelsee's Godfather (and play a little cribbage and golf). My brother Joseph, my sis in law Suzanne and their amazing daughter (my Goddaughter) Emily came from Rock Hill. Joe flew Emily in from Law School in Williamsburg, VA to surprise us all. Chelsee really took to all 3 of them. Suz became Chelsee's walking buddy and I loved seeing Emily share in the joy of a little girl!

Uncle Steve flew in from NJ which is ALWAYS a fun treat. Steve is a very special person to all of us. He always comes to see us for my sister's kid's birthdays, holidays and special events! I thought it was neat to hear Julee, Garrett and Lydia telling Chelsee all about Uncle Steve and how MUCH she is gonna love him...it is already starting!

As I looked around at the very personal gathering of my family and close friends during the ceremony, my heart grew again with love for this child and the extension of love she has already created within our family. I imagined how less than 2 months ago, she was one of a number of children being cared for in an orphanage halfway around the world and here she is now being brought into a much bigger family, physical and spiritual. Deacon Joe told us what a wonderful thing we have done for her when in fact, it is truly Chelsee herself that has brought a feeling of wonder to so many. So many have told me that seeing Chelsee blossom and grow in these last few weeks has brought them hope again and given them a little dose of promise in a tough world right now. Ahhh! And watching Julee stand up for Chelsee as her Godmother was a moment I want to remember forever. I was beaming with pride. Julee was holding Chelsee throughout most of the ceremony and I could see the pride in her eyes. After the part where we all placed the sign of the cross on her forehead with the holy water, Chelsee turned to me and motioned if she could have a turn? I asked Deacon Joe if Chelsee could bless herself and he said, "Why not!" So I leaned her over and she dipped her fingers in the holy water and put some on her forehead. It was a wonderful moment. I've only ever been to a baby's baptism so this thought had never crossed my mind. It was just perfect!

Here is God's newest angel:

The Pipsqueak, the Pistol and the Phirst Poop!

Boy, it sure is hard to get 2 minutes to myself when you have a 3 year old around. It has been 10 years since I had a 3 year old around so forgive me for forgetting how much time they take up.

Chelsee Fu Mei is doing amazingly well. She continues to thrive and squeal with delight all day long. She just seems so happy to be with us and she loves her new surroundings and activities. This is a child who loves to be outside running around, getting stronger by the day....she loves her big sister with all her heart and allows me to comfort her whenever a kiss or hug is needed. She has special hand signs just for her dad and loves to help him cook and sample all kinds of junk food with him (ahem!!) She even shows Philly some attention with soft tummy rubs. Right now, she is laying with Julee watching her first movie, Wall-E. We feel so blessed to be able to show her love, attention and happiness. She is indeed showing us her new happy self as well.

The Pipsqueak
Last week, we visited the pediatrician for the first time. It is hard to fill out the New Patient questionnaire when so much is unknown about her history so "Unknown" will become the word I have to use on most lines of most forms from here on out. But the doctor was quite pleased with her overall well being. She did not make it on to the American charts for weight (yet) at 23.5 lbs. But she is in the 5th percentile for height at 36 inches!! We documented a few of her birthmarks and physical attributes. We are still debating the vaccinations dilemma. I have her Chinese vaccination record (it is being translated now) and together with that and the doctor's determination, we will proceed cautiously with vaccinating her for school after she turns 4. We left there feeling very good about her overall health and very optimistic for her advancement in the next year or so. I would not be surprised at all if she can enter Kindergarten as a 5 year old in the fall of 2010.

The Pistol
And I would also not be surprised if at her first Kindergarten Parent/Teacher conference they tell me she is one obstinate child! I'll have to say "Uh, yea I know!" Two nights ago, there was the first stand off since we have been home. Now, this standoff was only a little similar to the ones we experienced in China where she stomps her feet 2 or 3 times as if to say "No way am I doing what you want me to!" This one was definitely more about being 3 years old than being scared or frustrated. And we have made progress because at least this time, I was not put in a time out! So, silly me, all I asked of her was to put her blue crayon on the table before laying with me to go to bed and fall asleep. She usually cleans up all her toys by herself after brushing her teeth and putting on her pjs, but apparently, this was the last straw for her and there was major foot stomping and the pout and the head toss that have become so familiar when Miss Chelsee Fu Mei does NOT want to do something! We keep telling her to say "No thank you" or "Please no!" but foot stomping is much more fun and effective. Al and I could tell this was not a cry out for help or a frightened moment, so we tried to hold our ground by just reiterating to put the crayon on the table and then you can come lay with Mommy. NO! "Oh, go ahead Chelsee Fu Mei, all you have to do is put the crayon on the table and then you can go sleepies." NO! NO! NO! Foot stomp, Head toss, Pout! So we just let her be. Tick, tock, tick, tock! 15 minutes later: "Want to come to mommy and lay down?" NO! &^% NO! Tick, tock, tick, tock! 10 more minutes later: she is starting to fall asleep standing up as she continues her protest of the mean mom and dad! I open my arms to motion for her to come in and she runs to me. But right before she gets to my arms, she spies the blue crayon on the end of the recliner! She looks at me, I look at her! She takes it and walks it back over to the table and then runs into my arms. I gather her up and within literally 30 seconds, she is asleep!! Priceless!

The First Poop
Over the last 2 weeks we have been home, she has learned so many new words and gestures and sounds and ideas, it is staggering. My only complaint is that some of these words are words taught to her by her dad and her sister (and some cousins, too....you know who you are!). Words like Buggar, Poop, Piggy Mommy (no matter who burps) which is followed by a High Five to solidify the dis of Mommy, P.U. for something stinky like my socks, and other less than stellar sayings. I have managed to teach her to count to 10, say Please and sign for "I Love You" but everything else is for amusement in my humble opinion! And, to add to my challenges, I have also had to do the majority of stinky changes of underwear or pull-ups! Each one is followed by giggles from her, her sister and her dad. Why am I the only one not laughing? She then proceeds to say Poop and point to her bottom. So, she gets it, but she just won't get it in the pot! She can tell us it needs to happen but getting it to happen ain't happenin'! Until today! But not for me! For Julee! Julee yelled for me to come look and be amazed. And there the two of them are, beaming with pride! Al is high fiving everyone and I bring the Skittles for rewards! Yahooo! Hopefully, the rest of them will land in the same place!

We have also all slept through the night in our own beds at least once. We are well on our way to a new normal and a workable schedule! Now if someone in this household could win a small lottery, we would be all set! Adding another family member is very $tre$$ful on the non existent budget of a Hospitality Manager of a seasonal hotel and a newly unemployed Data Analyst. Sighing with a smile. We know what to be thankful for!

Leaps and Bounds

We have been home 5 days and the strides in our new little girl have been nothing short of amazing. She is happy almost all day even when she doesn't get her way. She is learning so much by the hour it is hard to keep up. Her English is flying out of her mouth and her confidence is brimming over. She is sweet with Philly now and can even tell her to Sit and Shake! She is eating well and showing us all her new likes and dislikes. She can play by herself for quite some time but prefers to be playing with one of us.

Fu Mei is taking to her dad very well. They have made dinner together and Al has given her a bath with no problems. She will let him hold her sometimes and she likes to put her index finger up next to his to mean "I'll be right back!" They are both doing really well together!

We just sorta hit the ground running as far as getting back into our lives and hectic schedule. On Saturday morning, all four of us were headed out to one of Julee's weekly soccer games. Thankfully, this one wasn't too far away. She thoroughly enjoyed watching Julee play and I was teaching her to yell out "Julee!" really loud. From the field, Julee shot me that look that said "Mom, that is really distracting." Ahh, success! Hahha! So far, Fu Mei loves her car seat for which I am eternally grateful! In fact, she falls asleep in it almost all the time if the trip is longer than a few minutes!

She has been sooo well received at Julee's school and church and all about town. So many people love her already and are so excited to have us home with her. We can feel the love everywhere we go!

Now, all we need is sleep! Night time is still proving a bit difficult but not near as bad as that first night. Basically, I can get her to sleep either in my arms or on the floor and I can transfer her to her bed but usually, she is up in a few hours crying and wanting to come in to our bed. For now, its ok! Just that we can't sleep well when she is in there with us. She is sleeping but we aren't! It will come!

And here is some interesting news. As we suspected, we have learned that Fu Mei was indeed in foster care for a period of time. I contacted Love Without Boundaries who sponsors Fu Mei's orphanage and a nice lady responded quickly saying she did indeed know Fu Mei and will be sending me a CD with reports and pictures dating back to March 2006. That is incredibly rewarding to me. I am thrilled.

Lastly, we are beginning to add Chelsee to her name. Right now, we sometimes call her Chelsee Fu Mei and she turns her head. She can even say Chelsee. She can say anything you ask her to if she wants to. She is a delight and we are falling madly in love..............

Our first day home...

Pretty rough night, not unexpected, just rough. I remember how strange I felt on my first night in Beijing. The smells. the sights, the sounds, all of it was so weird and unnerving. Imagine how that must feel to a 3 year old. A tired one! Fu Mei did fine when either Julee or I were holding her. She made some good contact and progress with Al. He was thrilled that she could blow him kisses and say Baba to him. She giggled a little and checked out her room and Philly! But as soon as I put her down in her bed last night, she screamed. And it was that blood curdling screaming. Poor thing. And at first, I was no comfort for her. In fact, I caused this problem, so I was the enemy! But a few hours later, she finally just collapsed in her bed with me next to her. She had had enough. I slipped out at 342am to finally collapse in my OWN bed! Ahhhhh!! Sweet!

But at 630 this morning, more blood curdling screams. I didn't really know what to try so Albee said just bring her in to bed with us. She fell right back to sleep and we all slept til almost 11a! Tossed and turned but still some decent sleep for what we went through yesterday! Julee managed a really good night sleep too! Thank goodness!

Today, Fu Mei has been very happy. Albee made her pancakes, macs n cheese and fish sticks for some good old American foods on a Friday in Lent! I even ventured out to the weekly Chinese lessons that our FCC group goes to. I thought Fu Mei might like to see all the girls and hear some Chinese. She was pensive for most of it but toward the end, she got up and played. I am hoping these gatherings will bring her some relief and pleasure. It was so wonderful to see my friends there who have been following our journey for three years since we moved to HH! They were soo happy for us to be home and finally join them with our newest member! Fu Mei was pretty animated for them and turned on a little of her charm. I think they like her???!!!!

Then later, we had the pleasure of a home cooked meal by my friend Anne and her daughter Mary who was also adopted from China...almost 12 years ago. They have been so anxious for us to get home too. Thank you Anne and Mary for our yummy meal and homecoming!

And finally, my sweet mom got to meet our new daughter today! You probably know the joy of seeing your mom with your new child. It is really one of life's better moments. My mom was soo happy for us to be home safely; she knew how nervous I was about the trip. Fu Mei recognized my mom from her pictures but she just stared at my mom too. My mom is perfect in that she won't try to force Fu Mei to let her hold her. She will let Fu Mei come to her on her own terms. What a blessing my mom is. I loved seeing her feel the love of another grandchild. It has been a long time since she had a new grandchild but still the same sweetness. I am so happy my mom could see her finally. She has believed in our dream since the day I called her to tell her our news over 4 years ago! If only my precious dad could have been here today!

Home Sweet Home!

Holy &^%$, that was a looong day! We woke up on Thursday morning in Guangzhou at the usual 4am on March 12, 2009 (which was 4p Wednesday March 11 in SC). By 6am, we were on a bus to the airport with one more suitcase and one more person than we had when we started this adventure 2 weeks ago!

At 645a, we had our first snafu. A truly nauseating one! At check in for our flight to Beijing, Julee's and my reservation could not be found in the system. Thank goodness we still had a guide with us; otherwise, we would still be there I believe. With 5 minutes left to spare before check in for our flight was closed, our bags were cleared and boarding passes issued and the 3 families travelling back on the same itinerary were cleared to board. Yes, this "issue" was holding others up too. I really wanted to puke! Having vast experience in the airline business, I knew full well that when reservations are "lost," they are not usually "found." I really don't even want to know what went wrong. Those reservations were made by Great Wall. Racing to the gate, we ran on the plane and plopped down in several different seats a few rows from each other. Fu Mei thought this was a riot! I did not!

But we landed safely in Beijing and had to *gasp* proceed to our international flight all by ourselves. No more guides. As Tricia said, who would have thought we could manage to make our way through the massive Beijing airport just 2 weeks ago? Now, it really was no problem. We had to get our bags, and then check them in with United for our new international flights home. We had about 5 hours to get this accomplished and after a very spicy chicken lunch, we were sitting, waiting for our flight to Chicago. It seemed to take forever to finally board that 777 home. I really don't want to get in to how awful the flight was for me because basically, they got us home (or at least to Chicago, which felt like home after that horrendously long flight). Fu Mei slept for a good bit of it and played with me for the rest of it. She did great. At one point, she slipped off the seat and laid out on the floor beneath my feet. Long gone are the germ phobias that I began this trip with. If you could see the smog and dirt and feel the water bacteria and look at the raw food for eating, an airplane floor would not bother you either!

So fast forward to Chicago! Ahhhh, America! Never has it felt soo powerful and emotional to be back in the USA. We really do have an amazing country! It felt soo good to be home! We made it through immigrations for our newest little immigrant and then through customs without incident but it did take an hour and a half! And finally, after 2 weeks, I turned on my cell phone! Talked to Al right away, neither of us could talk very well, the relief was overwhelming. He told me the whole house was cleaned, the dog was bathed, the fresh groceries were stocked and the car was full of gas and had a brand new car seat all ready to go! So Tricia went in to Aunt mode and bought Fu Mei her first Happy Meal! That went down well for ALL of us! Man, I hadn't had a McDonald's hamburger and a diet coke with ice in a looooong time! Yum!! On to Savannah and the reunion we have all been waiting for!

I carried Fu Mei off the flight instead of in the stroller. I just wanted to be close to her when she met her dad for the first time. As we walked up the ramp to the waiting area in Savannah airport, she was laughing and giggling with me, Julee, Tricia and Garrett....her new family! Wait, uh oh! What is this? You want me to meet MORE family? I just got comfy with you people???

As soon as Julee saw her dad, she dropped her backpack and whatever else she was carrying for me and ran into his arms. I came up from behind with Fu Mei and their eyes met. She just stared! I knew she could tell it was her Baba from all the pictures we showed her, but it was all too much. All she could muster was a stare. We hugged tightly and kept trying to speak to her to tell her it was ok and this is your new daddy! It was hard on all of us. Ken brought Lydia to the airport too and she was crying. She waited a very long time to meet Fu Mei, longer than we did because she had to stay home. All in all, it was a wonderful greeting. Lydia made the prettiest sign and had balloons for Chelsee. It felt sooo good to have made it! So good!

The car ride home was fine. Fu Mei went in her car seat with no problems and Julee and I talked Albee's ear off the whole way home from the airport! 30 hours after starting the day, it was still March 12, 2009! But never has a day been better! We are home!

Our last day in China

Today was another special day here in China. We were bused to the American Consulate in Guangzhou where we took an Oath so that we could receive Fu Mei's visa to travel to the United States. No pictures or video but it will always be in my memories. It was more emotional than I thought it would be and I was beginning to become proud to bring her home to America. There were many other families with us and a few of them were singled out and honored because this was their second adoption from China. Hats off to them, that is unimaginable to me!

I was talking to another wonderful family and they felt as strongly as I do that when you visit China and see how some of their people live and what their future entails, especially those that have their start in an orphanage, we feel that bringing them to the US, with its endless opportunities is a very powerful feeling. Our guide explained that for the most part, children in the orphanages who do not get adopted have two options in life. They may stay at the orphanage as a nanny caring for the other children or they may leave the orphanage for life on the streets and a job at a factory working long hours everyday for pennies. Knowing this helps me come to terms with bringing Fu Mei home with us. Thank you Andy and Susie for helping me feel better about all this.

I will miss China. I may not be back anytime soon, but it will always be in my heart, exactly where Fu Mei has lived for so long!

The things they are teaching her....

This afternoon, Fu Mei's voice reached another level, decibel actually! Julee taught her "Mommy" and how to scream it! Nice!! So now she is yelling for me and cracking herself up! It is music to my ears the first 100 times! She hardly ever tell us "Ni Fang Pi Le!" (You Fart) anymore! It is now "Oh Piggy!" whether it is a burp, hiccup, sneeze, kiss or true fart! And it is very clear too! She can show off her new shoes if you ask her to and she likes to say "Oh man!" when she drops something or makes a mistake! She holds her nose after she smells someone's feet and says something like "P.U.!" How quickly she is picking up on little things.

She is still quick to get mad or frustrated but we give her a few minutes or more and she returns to us. The best part of the day today was when we went to the Pearl Market via a pretty scary taxi ride. We were dropped off at a large square filled with people. It was sorta unnerving at first, very crowded with strange looking characters. One man was feeding a pond full of coy fish by a bottle!! Yes, creepy! We were guided to a more secure area where there were booths upon booths of pearl stores. Each one looked the same but they all promised the best price. So while we were shopping, I took over holding her (no strollers allowed). And I started rocking her and singing to her. She had her arms around my neck. I felt her body begin to relax and for the first time, she fell asleep in my arms. I know it was a really good breakthrough for her to be able to relax enough to fall asleep, the sweet thing. And it felt soo nice for me! Although my arms are not used to it, nothing would have made me let go!

Tonight's dinner at the local Cantonese restaurant was awesome. Again, we walked just down the street from the hotel. It was served family style on the circular wheel in the middle of the big table. We had 4 families at our table and the others took up 3 more large table. We ate the most delicious broccoli ever - even better than Hefei's broccoli. Julee had seconds!! A plate of spinach filled (or was it leeks) dumplings came next. Then some beef with peppers and onions, then orange chicken with sweet and sour sauce and the always present, Chinese noodles. We are such experts on noodles that we compare them to others on our trip. So far, the best noodles have been from Holiday Inn Hefei's Noodles and Chopsticks 24 hour restaurant. Next, they brought congee and eggs for the babies but Fu Mei helped herself to some of that plus all the food on the wheel. She takes longer to eat than Grandma does! She gave me her chopsticks; I believe she is not going to use them. I liked the green beans here too. They are doused in oil and bean paste but oh, so yummy! The veggies here are probably my favorite thing. Julee asked me to make them that way at home! If only!

We ate some local ice cream and are now playing in Tricia's room. Fu Mei is very busy! Very deliberate and confident right now. I bet part of it is because she napped! She was a riot at dinner and let me kiss her and feed her. We played nosy, nosy and make lots of touching contact. She is amazing! We are sooo blessed!

A free day in Guangzhou...sorta

Pretty girl in her Care Package outfit

Medical appointment in Guangzhou

Last night's dinner at the famous Italian restaurant was fantastic. Michael knows where Americans can eat safely and where they will enjoy a taste of home as we near the end of this loooong adventure. Since Italian is my favorite type of dish anyway, I was salivating by the time we got there. It was a pleasant 10 minute walk from our hotel. The white, 3-story building it was in looked spectacular at night with the pretty white lights that I like. Places are not stroller friendly here, so after climbing 3 stories with the "Empress" in her thrown, we arrived to a banquet style seating for about 10 families. There are so many servers waiting on you each minute; I will surely miss the service we receive over here. I ordered a meat lasagna entree for Fu Mei and I and after she was done with her umpteenth fit of the day, she devoured it. It really was good, but I am now craving Ken's lasagna even more. I paid 48 Yuan for the lasagna (under $7.50) and 30 Yuan for the Sprite (about $4.50 ugh!). Julee ordered the Lasagna with mushrooms but it came with a white sauce so she wasn't as happy with hers as she was with mine! I may never get my own meal again! Tricia had the risotto with mushrooms (yum!) and Garrett got a giant calzone! It was another thoroughly enjoyable time! We hurried back home to Skype with Al again and Fu Mei hopped right on the microphone and told her dad all about everything. Soon she will put a face to the voice. I know he is looking forward to it, I can tell he can't wait any longer!!

There never really is a completely free day to spend as you wish but today (Tuesday, March 10th) we don't have much planned. It is an important paperwork day but I do not have to be present for it. Today is our Consulate Appointment (CA). Michael Walker Michael took all of my paperworks to the Consulate and the paperworks is being "interviewed" as we speak. He told me that one form needs my signature but that will be no problem. One more day of paperworks and I am home free!

Later, we are going to the pearl market by taxi. It still isn't sunny but the temp is pleasant. We see the boats going by on the river outside our hotel room and Fu Mei likes to look at them. Tricia taught her "boat" today! "Shoes" yesterday and "boat" today! She may not be speaking any Chinese by the time we get home. But still, it is fascinating to me to watch her learn and adapt. Michael speaks to her in Chinese and I love to watch her listen to him. You can just feel the relief on her body as she listens and understands. We have tried the TV a couple of times. There was a cartoon we thought she would like but she was too busy playing and pushing around her stroller and taking all her toys and putting them in the basket. When she is doing this, she seems perfectly confident and content. It is a nice sign. All 3 year olds like to push strollers and place their toys in one spot for safe keeping. I liked it when she took her slippers and tried to put them on the baby doll. She is doing really really well. Just the language part is frustrating for all of us!

Oh gosh, how could I forget yesterday's remarkable shopping experience? Ok, you know I have been trying to buy this kid a pair of shoes for how long now? Ever since we got her referral I have been trying to determine her shoe size. I still don't know it but I just measure up the shoe with the one I am trying to buy. In Hefei, she got a new white pair that was a size 19 but a 19 here in Guangzhou is not the same. Anyway, I have been trying to buy her a pair of black Mary Jane looking shoes. She is not interested and she won't wear the white ones either. So, we keep putting on her brown Gotcha boots that she came with. They are hideous to me, but she loves them and I like that they make her happy. Well yesterday, after looking at many more black squeaky shoes and each being turned down by Fu Mei, a lady at one of the stores told me that since Fu Mei is a little older, she would probably not like a dark shoe. And that little Chinese girls would probably like a brighter color shoe, like pink or yellow or something. So she went back and brought out 4 new pairs of shoes. 3 different shades of pink and something else. She asked Fu Mei if she liked them and her arm flew out and her finger pointed to the bright pink one! 3 seconds later, her foot was stuck out to try on her new shoe!!!!!!!!!!! She loved them. She also like the pale pink ones and the all the other pretty colored ones!!!!!!!! Oh lordy! Had I only known...the child did not want a dark shoe! How was I supposed to know?? So now, I can't get them off her, she pitched a major fit last night taking off her clothes and shoes. The days are getting harder as she gets more comfortable AND defiant. I am so happy she is showing her emotions though! It is all good! Just so hard!

Happy Birthday Ken. Today we are the same age since you are now 45 and I am also 45 in China (since my paperworks was frozen back in 2006 here, that is how old I am too). That is my story and I am sticking to it!

Today, I was the brave one...

We had a really great dinner last night at the local Thai restaurant. I would say about 20-25 families were there; we took up the whole restaurant. What a joyous celebration. The menu was like a book, 25 pages or more with some very weird sounding dishes. Like Curry worms, Green Prawns with tomato, Whole fish Thai style. Ughh! I chose a delicious Vegetable Rice with Cashews, Shrimps and Coconut over cabbage mustard! It was yummy! I ordered Fu Mei some garlic chicken wings which were also de-lish. Julee and Tricia split 2 dinners: Fried Rice Thai style and Pad Tai. They weren't as impressed as I was but we all enjoyed the experience. Our chopstick skills have greatly improved. I managed to get all my cashews up and into my mouth!
This morning, we were back to our appointments. Again, we had to wake Fu Mei up and that always starts the day off badly. She really had a hard time this morning. Kicking and screaming. No potty. Nothing! Just finally plopped her in the high chair at breakfast and put some food in front of her. I feed her a meat, veggie, fruit and carb at just about every meal. She eats very well. Loves all the veggies and fruits so far. After breakfast, there was another tantrum. This time she was hitting me. It really bothered Julee but I tried to explain that she is lashing out and feeling so upset and frustrated but it is ok. I just held her and told her no each time she hit me. It took quite some time but she calmed down and most likely learned a little bit about "No!" Baby steps.

The four families from Anhui met to go to the medical exam and photographer for the visa photo. Fu Mei was still crying and visibly upset but as I was pushing her in the stroller on the walk to the appointments, she started to come around. It so sad to witness her struggling to right herself and accept that life as she knew it is over. We all know she is moving on to something better, but she doesn't! This is the hardest part for me. That is until we enter the medical clinic. I got the heebee jeebeez right away. I didn't do well at this part when I had to take Julee to the doctors, let alone in a foreign country! So I had to be brave today and suck it up. I asked our guide, Michael Walker Michael, to talk to Fu Mei. Tell her what is going on so she won't be so scared. It really helped. She cooperated with the doctors and laid down when she was asked to and stuck out her tongue on command. It was a rudementary examination but she was declared healthy! She weighs a whopping 24 lbs now, 2 of which I believe were gained this week since we've had her! At the visa photo room, Michael told her that she was a very pretty girl and they wanted to take her picture. So they placed her on a chair and they told her to look at the camera. When she did, she flashed her bright smile for the camera! It was a pose for sure! Oh shades of my sweet Lydia!! I can't wait for you to meet her, sweetie!

On our walk back to the hotel, I stopped at a souvenir shop and picked up a few more goodies. Sorry Al, but I have spent more money in the 2 days we have been in Guangzhou than I have the entire time in Beijing and Hefei. We came back to the room to find Julee still sorta upset about the temper tantrum and maybe beginning to not feel all that well. I held her for a while. I keep saying this but it's alot for her to absorb too! I hope she is ok. I've got 2 girls to worry about now!

This afternoon, we will take a picture on the famous Red Couch at the White Swan. It is customary for the children to be photographed together for posterity. We hope to keep in touch with all of our new families!

Oh and I forgot to mention 2 stories....1) Back in Hefei, on the day we went to the shopping plaza by ourselves, we stopped in the Nike store to look at sneakers for Julee. You can tell it's a Nike store by the swoosh logo, it does not say Nike. Inside there were some mannequins with soccer balls at their feet. They were modeling the work out suits and equipment. Bold and oblivious to customs, Julee picked up the soccer ball and started juggling it on her knees and feet. Oh my gosh, within 3 seconds, there were about 3 employees gathered around yelling for others to come see! She looked around and she was the center of attention. They all clapped and seemed to ask for more, so she did! Huge smiles all around! That was a very cool moment!

And 2) on the way back from lunch yesterday in Guangzhou, we passed by the local shops and they were kicking around a feathered jingly thing. It looked like hacky sack but with a feathered object. Julee asked them how much and 5 Yuan later, Julee is trying to juggle this new thingy. After a couple of attempts, she was getting it. Garrett and Dominic (a new sibling that hangs around us more than his new brother....hmmm, does it have anything to do with Julee being about the same age?) also got in on the act and in a matter of minutes, the 3 of them were tossing it back and forth on their feet between them. The locals loved it and told them they were very good learners. These are some of the fun little times that continue to happen and just make our trip so wonderful. We really are enjoying ourselves.

Wow, Guangzhou is not like Hefei

Fu Mei's first flight was uneventful, which is exactly how I like all my flights, especially the landings! She sat right in her middle seat beside Julee and me, strapped in her CARES harness. She thought the whole thing was quite interesting. That bodes well for us seeing that she will be taking quite a few more flights in her lifetime!

So with that big test behind us, we arrived at the Guangzhou airport which already made us feel safer and happier. The Hefei airport was scary looking to say the least. Not sure I have the words to really describe the Hefei airport other than what comes to mind: Third World. But in modernized, urban Guangzhou, we were met by our new guide, Michael Walker Michael. Michael for short. We were bused to the famous White Swan hotel which is technically on Shamian Island. It is gorgeous, a 5 star lobby with 4 star rooms....however, we are back to our "brick" beds. Sigh! The view out of our 10th floor hotel room is stunning. We grabbed a quick American dinner at nearby Lucy's Cafe which caters to adopting families. I was so ready for a good American burger, but mine was served to me a little on the red side, so it creeped me out. I sent it back for a well done version, just to be safe! We crashed literally on our beds (and noisy crib for Fu Mei) and slept away the night.....

Still waking at 4am which is getting old but I am able to ponder the magnitude of this amazing journey to my little sweetie pie. As I have said before, it took me a looong time to have my first child and a looooong time to have my second. Sometimes when I look back at my years of wanting to be a mom and finally being a mom and now being a mom of 2 children, I think that I am blessed in a way. I have thoroughly enjoyed being just Julee's mom for so long; we will forever be like glue since we have spent so much time just the two of us. Now, we both get to share in the joy of another child. Julee said it so sweetly. She said Al and I already had a daughter so we were already Mom and Dad, but now we have another daughter to love. But only Julee got something brand new: a sister! This is what I contemplate at 4am. And also how much we have absorbed in the short time we have been here. I am missing Al so much for what he is missing here. Not the bonding, etc, that will come. But the experience of being here so far away and learning so much and becoming lifelong friends with other families.

The breakfast buffet here at the White Swan is all that I had heard it would be. Lots of great American breakfast foods and even some chicken nuggets (big hit with Fu Mei and Julee and Garrett were sooo happy to have a taste of home)!! I had a delicious chocolate chip muffin. There hasn't been a whole lot of chocolate happening over here, so that was awesome. Plus we had coffee finally....so I was happy! The veggies and Chinese noodles are still available which we have come to crave at breakfast time.

Michael arranged for a tour of the Chen Family Temple which was a bit more colorful and touristy than our Baogongci Temple in Hefei. In Guangzhou we are surrounded by pretty trees and nice looking stores. It reminds me of Vegas in a way because of all the lights and the emphasis on taking your money for a cheap souvenir. We can see the river and Guangzhou proper and it is just beautiful. It is nice to see something pretty again. So back to the temple and museum. The carvings, calligraphy, rice paper embroidery, hand paintings, and stoneware were so interesting to me. The kids were just hanging out with each other and the other family's siblings. They have grown quite close. It was all we could do to keep them interested in this temple. Sounds like me when I was a kid!

Next, we left for the "mall." Of course it is not like our malls, but it was a very pretty store where they had some beautiful pearls, jade, silk outfits, scarves, and many other gifts. Michael explained that this store was where the well-made gifts would be. There will be other places we'll see that will have cheaper versions of these fine wares so if we cared about the person we were purchasing for, this would be the place to buy them something! Yes, mom, we picked out something for you here!!!

After another quick meal at Lucy's (we tried to go to Subway, but they were out of bread!?!), I had to go to Michael's room for more paperwork. It is really getting to me, this endle$$ paperwork. Now that we are legally Fu Mei's parents, all we really have left to do is leave China. But that is complicated and tedious to say the least. I am sooo tired of the paperworks (as Michelle called it)! But I will always and forever do what it takes to make sure Fu Mei is with us. Her visa is beginning to be processed and next we have her medical exam and visa photo session tomorrow. That is all for appointments for today and tomorrow. We will have some free time, which we are all coveting. We are safe to walk about here by ourselves and even take a taxi to other areas. It feels safer and better. People speak clearer English here if they are able to but by now, we are making ourselves understood in basic Chinese coupled with hand gestures. I dropped my laundry off at the local Ladybug Laundry and Sundries store and got a "free to borrow" stroller for the week.

The families that we started out with in Beijing are also now in Guangzhuo and it is wonderful to see all the newly formed families. We are hearing story after story about their Gotcha Days and every one is better than the next. They all tell us Fu Mei is adorable and that her smile lights up her face. We can ask her to say hi to people and if she is in the mood, she will flash that million dollar smile and wave! Lydia, you are gonna LOVE this kid! Julee is having fun "babysitting" Fu Mei. She runs up and down the halls with her and picks her up and throws her around already! Garrett gets the cutest smiles from her. Then when J and G want to hang out with the other older kids, they dump Fu Mei on me or Tricia! hahahah! Sounds about right to me!

Tonight, all the families from Great Wall (21 in all, I think) are going to the famous Thai restaurant close by. It is so enjoyable to spend time with so many different families and talk about their hometowns and the family they have at home.

Still waiting for sunshine and warm weather. We were promised that here in Guangzhou but haven't seen it yet.....

Goodbye Hefei, Hello Guangzhou

We are just about to leave our Holiday Inn Downtown Hefei for the airport to fly China Southern to Guangzhou. The porters have come for the checked luggage and we are checking for anything left behind. It's hard to believe we are already on our way to the last leg of this journey. The days have been sooo long here but yet, it seems to have passed by so quickly. As I said before, I am sad to take Fu Mei away from here. I held her while looking out the window of our 24th floor room, and I told her as much as I could about Hefei and Anhui province. I wish we could have gone to Lu'An City where she was in her orphanage so I could help her remember more, but this will have to do.....til next time. I would love to see Julee bring Fu Mei back someday and this time, Lydia would get to come!!!

More later when we arrive in Guangzhou. Maybe we will see the sun?

Another Adventure in Hefei

Karyn forgot to mention one event about our shopping trip out in Hefei. Our guide warned us that when we ventured out without her, the locals would be very curious about who we were and why we had Chinese babies. She gave us badges written in Chinese to wear around our necks to explain that we had adopted these children and that we promised to love and care for them etc. After the families had lunch at Pizza Hut, the older kids and a few of the adults went to get some Dairy Queen. By the way, the Green Tea and Brownie Blizzard was pretty gross, but that's another story.... While the gang was getting their ice cream, 2 other parents and I waited outside with the children. The locals started coming around and we showed them our badges. They read them but didn't walk away. They stayed and looked at the babies and motioned for more people to come over. Soon people simply saw a crowd and started coming over to see what everyone was looking at. Before we knew it, the crowd was 6 people deep and we were totally surrounded. We were so uncomfortable. Some of the women were touching the babies and one asked me, "Why you come here?" They don't seem to have the same personal space boundaries that we have and we were dying to get out of there but couldn't escape. They were actually pushing us and we became concerned for our safety and that of the babies. After about 10 minutes, one of the moms came out of the Dairy Queen and was wondering what everyone was gathered looking at. When she saw it was us, she quickly broke up the crowd and helped us get out. I told her to go back and tell Karyn what had happened and that we were leaving right away. We escaped the mob and chalked it up to another adventure in Hefei! Whew!!! I needed some ice cream after that!
Tricia

A free day in Hefei

Today was our first real free day since we arrived in China. We had no appointments, no tours and no paperwork. I did receive Fu Mei's Chinese passport today though. She is free to fly to Guangzhou with us tomorrow afternoon.

And I would like to report that I slept in finally! I still woke up at 4:04am as I have since we got here but I was able to get back to sleep this time! I could not believe it when I saw the clock at 7:45a this morning...ahhh!!

Last night, we had a great conversation with Al via Skype. Fu Mei was in rare form and repeating everything we were saying plus some! Al thoroughly enjoyed his conversation with her. He was able to ask her questions and tell her what to say; I know it felt like his first real connection to her. We told him about the "You fart" in Chinese; he could not believe it. I think it endeared her to him. She even said it for him. Oh and I even got to "talk" to Philly! Al put the headphones up to her ears and I spoke to her in my mic. Al said her ears perked straight up, she tilted her head and looked at him! Insert "awwwwww!" here.

So after slowly rousing this morning and another wonderful breakfast, we decided to venture out on our own to the shopping area nearby. We went there the first day to buy supplies but we had Michelle with us. This time, just the families went. I stopped in 2 children's clothing stores and bought Fu Mei her first pair of shoes!! And a clean outfit that fits her! The pants I have for her here are too big. I think the cooler clothes I have for her to use in Guangzhou will fit better but she looks like a rag-a-muffin in all the mismatched, too large clothes she has been wearing. We don't care tho, she looks like a million dollars to us!!!

The kids are having a blast..they know and like all the other families and their children. There is another 12 year old boy and a sweet 6 year old girl (besides all the newly adopted babies). Such wonderful people. I am honored to share this adventure with them and we are all planning a reunion in Hilton Head.

Since we leave tomorrow for Guangzhou, we wanted to see if there was anything we forgot to do this week in Hefei. We heard about the awesome massages at our hotel's salon even before we got here, so Tricia talked me into getting a massage. 38 Yuan for 30 minutes which equates to about $7. I've never had one before, heck I only a few years ago allowed a stranger to touch my feet for a pedicure (I am now completely over that phobia)!!!! We let the kids babysit Fu Mei if you can believe that! Tricia said it's the second kid syndrome kicking in already! Whatever! We were just downstairs. We arrive at the salon, and I chose the Head Massage and Tricia chose the Shoulder massage. We were taken to one room with 2 beds and asked to wait a minute (although we did not know that is what they said). Soon a beautiful woman comes in and motions for who is getting the Head Massage? My arm slowly goes up! I am hardly able to believe I am even in China, let alone getting a massage from someone who doesn't even speak English! But what the heck, I am going for it! So she begins with my face, oh man, it is feeling so nice! Hey, this is ok, not too uncomfortable and sorta downright feels good. I start to relax. A man walks in without knocking (see, that is why I could never get a body massage) and brings in water that I would not touch in a million years. Another woman walks in to tell Tricia that she has to wait but shows her that the TV can be turned on. We kinda giggle at that hoping against hope that General Hospital will be on. Chinese television leaves alot to be desired; in fact, it has only been on once since we have been here. But the woman tells Tricia in English, "[Channel] One, H-B-O!" That brings more giggles. So I am starting to enjoy my first massage and in walks Tricia's masseuse. She begins to rub Tricia's shoulders and I ask how it feels and she says it feels nice. Then I start to hear some tapping, then some heavy hitting and then some pounding!!! I'm like, is that what she is supposed to be doing? I ask Tricia but when she responds, it is with garbled words cause the pounding is making it sound like you are driving on the edge of the highway where the ripples are!! I am really laughing so hard on the inside but so relaxed now that I can't move to save my sister from torture. Lordy, it is making me laugh all over again! My massage keeps getting better and better and I am in heaven. Tricia on the other hand is being beaten now and is probably bleeding and bruised but I don't care and can't get up anyway! After I was done, I sat up and laid back to rest while they continued to beat up my sister. As her massage was ending, the masseuse gave her one last giant hit on the middle of the back with an "ok?" question. Tricia says yes, sure! She leaves and I ask if she is ok and she falls on the bed saying, "Noooooooooooo, I am not!" I can't even type this without getting tickled again. We are both dissolved in laughter and I look at her back and it is beet red and about 180 degrees! I doubt she will be sleeping on her back tonight! We will never forget that one!

When we return to the room, Julee has Fu Mei in her stroller in the room in a time out! It appears that Fu Mei did not like it when Julee told her she was not allowed to throw the Barrel O'Monkeys around the room anymore for the millionth time! So Fu Mei was pouting! Big time! Arms crossed, bottom lip sticking out. Man, she is something else. Julee said she had had enough and could she go to the other room for a break! Sounds like sisters to me!

We had our 5th meal at Noodles and Chopsticks and celebrated our last night in Fu Mei's province. I have to admit, I am sad and pensive about leaving tomorrow. It feels strange to be taking her away from the only home she has ever known. I don't know if she will ever be back here again. I have loved every minute here because it is her land, but I can not wait to get one step closer to coming home with our wonderful new daughter! She has a daddy to meet, two grandmas, some very anxious cousins and a very missed dog! Plus alot of friends and family who love her simply because she is ours!

Wish us luck on her first flight.......

The first temper tantrum...

It happened out of the blue...I was laying on the bed playing with Fu Mei, stacking cups and building Barrel of Monkeys chains. Silly me, I took a tiny break to lay my head down and she came over and lifted my head up off the bed kinda hard. Hmmm! So I did it again! Oh no I di int! She proceeded to harshly move my head back up and took my hand and pulled hard. I sat up and she was pulling my sweater. Her face changed and she was very serious. I wondered if she needed to go to the bathroom so we headed toward there but no, she moved past the entrance and pulled me to the corner by the door. I was put in a time out! She pushed my leg to stay there. She even tried to open the door to kick me out!

She was having none of my attempts at humor about this whole situation. It was fascinating to say the least. She kept at it for quite a while too, stubborn little thing. I am looking into my future with her already! I tried to move to come back and sit down but I was pushed back! Hahaa! Finally, I sat back down and she was still pulling on my hands. She never let up. One of the other families came over for a visit and she still kept pulling. I decided to put her in her crib. She cried and cried. It finally ended when I broke out the bread. Smiles all around now!

Visit to Baogongci Temple and Museum

Even though I protest learning on my vacations... 1) this is NO vacation and 2) the temple and the true story of the Baogongci Judge from over 1000 years ago were fascinating.

After another good night, we woke up (me at 4am again, more on that later) and had our favorite meal of the day: Breakfast at the Holiday Inn Downtown Hefei Buffet. It really is yummy and is our biggest meal of the day. I didn't even have any normal breakfast food today. I had my usual large serving of broccoli, then added a leek dumpling, my fav candied nuts, a spinach and bok choy fried thingy, beef noodles with onions, pears, pineapples and apple juice. I feed Fu Mei all of that as well, plus some congee or rice soup. She is a VERY neat eater, which I love. She takes her napkin, folds it in half, and wipes her mouth when necessary. She still won't accept the chopsticks but she does very well with a spoon....from her left hand! She seems to eat mostly with her left but uses both hands for all the dexterity tasks. She wrote on paper today (my first love note) and she used her right hand! Anyway, we were going to allow Fu Mei to sleep in as late as possible before waking her up (she does NOT like that) for breakfast but the stench coming from the corner of the room woke the whole floor, I think! Yep, we've had the first blow out! Now skip to the next paragraph if you are queasy or not interested in the comings out of a newly adopted child from China who has probably never had broccoli or skittles before!! All of the 4 children our group just adopted have had BM issues...in that, no one has pooped in over 3 days!! Michelle told us this was very typical and to go ahead and give them the pedia-lax strips that I brought with me. Well, it worked! And how! She was able to tell us yesterday that she had to go to the potty (and Julee asks her sometimes instead) and she had her first BM. We were all clapping and so proud. Remember those days? Another one came later in the evening before bed last night, so I was feeling pretty confident that the poor thing had finally gotten some relief! Hence, no pull up!! Back to the stench this morning.....oh lordy, it was ripe! And she was still asleep! So, Tricia, Julee and I got our plan together. I ran the bath, Julee got the clean clothes ready and Trish went in for the kill. Lots of tears and screams for "MaMa" but I managed to get the clothes off and the giant turd in the pot! She pushed me away throughout the whole bath; who could blame her? I wouldn't want to be woken up and thrown in the tub even if I KNEW the people taking care of me! It was a quicky tho and soon she was dressed and smiling at Julee. Bless her heart!

So off to the temple by bus. It is still dreary, gray and damp. But the faux temple and gardens was actually halfway pretty. We learned about the fascinating life and story of Baogongci and how he was the only Judge who told the whole truth in the land. The Buddha looking statue was so large and gold in color, quite pretty. There was incense burning and Michelle told us that symbolized honor and respect to Baogongci. Trish and I explained we use incense in our religion as well and she seemed surprised. She thought only the Chinese used incense for religious purposes. Also there is the story told in beautifully dressed wax figures about an emperor named Chen Shi Mei whose wife supported him and took care of the family while he went away to study at an elite institution for higher education...and when he got back, he up and decided to take a different (i.e. younger) wife and leave his old wife! Well, Baogongci judged this sinful and the term "Chen Shi Mei" is still used today in China....we know it as the age old "man leaves wife for younger woman." 'Nuff said. We did buy some souvenirs here so we can remember Hefei and Anhui for Fu Mei. I wish we could see more of the city when it is green and pretty, but we really have been lucky to have been able to tour and learn so much about her area.

By far the funniest thing so far happened today at the temple and gardens. Beginning yesterday, Fu Mei has started actually talking to us and telling us things. Most times, she just gives a facial response which are fairly easy to read. But she is getting more comfortable (as are we) and so she is beginning to respond to us verbally. When Garrett and Julee are making her laugh, she will say something to them in Chinese. What I wouldn't give to understand it? She has the sweetest voice, too. We try to repeat her response back to her but we usually can't make the right sounds. Even tho Michelle is at our beck and call, we can't exactly have her living in our room to translate every word Fu Mei says! Julee and Garrett try to out-raspberry each other to make her laugh the loudest! You know, when you put both palms together to form a V and put them over your mouth and blow hard to make the raspberry noise??? They do it constantly and we have begun to hear the same response from Fu Mei each time. I can not say it but Julee can almost say it and can definitely recognize it from other things she says! So today, while were waiting for others at the gift shop, Garrett was making the raspberry sound to Fu Mei and it was making her laugh and respond! Abbey (a new big sister too, age 6) brought Michelle over to hear Fu Mei and Michelle knelt down and heard it. She laughed out loud and looked up at us!??! We said, "What is she saying?" Michelle said, "You fart!" That is what our sweet, innocent Fu Mei has been saying to Julee and Garrett since yesterday! The whole group was dying laughing. Michelle could not believe it! I believe the CCAA has indeed made the perfect match for us!!